The Voice of Treason

A Sporting Life

Writing by treason on Saturday, 25 of February , 2006 at 6:43 am

“I’m a Libertarian. You know what a libertarian is? A Republican in show business!”

– Tom Shillue

Childhood events can shape your life. I’ve written here about my little Italian mother who waited tables to keep us in a nice apartment near the lake in a nice Jewish neighborhood in Chicago. A single woman with kids, two cats, a raccoon and the unremitting fear of eviction. She taught us to (read: threatened to kill us if we didn’t) behave ourselves and be quiet. Like corpses. We learned early how to check pulses.

Individual pursuits were good for us. We read; we drew pictures; we colored in our coloring books; we played with paper dolls; we watched old movies, Cubs games, and documentaries. We weren’t particularly an athletic, exuberant bunch. Again, we excelled at individual pursuits. In school, I could out run any kid in my class. I was fast. I perfected my track skills by dashing from school to home, and up four flights of stairs in time for Garfield Goose. In high school I developed a talent for archery, then fencing.

Team sports, and anything associated with balls, were a challenge. I liked baseball and could run the bases and occasionally hit, but fielding was a different story. Volleyball, basketball, soccer - probably average. Utterly miserable at tennis. Small balls, I think, were the problem. I guess I couldn’t see them. And, frankly, I didn’t really want to.

Swimming, diving, skating, skiing. Gymnastics. Hopeless endeavors all. I don’t know if it’s a lack of coordination or balance or…well, a lack of desire. I am, I fear, a mere spectator in life. I like to watch other people who are better at these things do them. That’s why I enjoy the Olympics.

I’d planned to be glued to the set this year because they’re in Torino, but I’m only catching bits and pieces. I wept the other night after Silvia Fontana skated. And even though I’ve always had a special fondness for Irina Slutskaya, I had to root for Shizuka Arakawa. That Italian, Enrico Fabris, who won the gold when Davis and Hedrick took silver and bronze? I cheered for him and was glad to see him victorious. That South Korean speedskater? How does he manage to come from behind and get to the lead spot so quickly?

How do these people get their bodies to do what they do? How do they train their minds to dismiss a mistake and continue, knowing that it’s all over? To get up and keep going even though it hurts and they just can’t win? How do they get from not knowing how to do it to being the best at it? How do they train every day even if they feel sick or sad or tired? How can they accept defeat and be so gracious?

Drew Carey was interviewed by Bill O’Reilly the other night. He’s a Libertarian, but he wasn’t interested in talking about current events or politics. What he wanted to talk about was his passion: U.S. soccer. Soccer is serious business in other parts of the world. I don’t pay much attention to it because I don’t have kids and I’m not driving them to practice and games every day. It gets interesting for me when people in the stands try to kill one another.

Considering the level of passion, you’d think that would happen more often. Didn’t Drew Carey say that every time two teams play - who? Villareal? Real Madrid? Barcelona? who knows! - they are, in fact, refighting the Spanish Civil War? When the U.S. team played in Mexico, Mexicans chanted during our national anthem: “Osama! Osama!” Cubs fans are much more gracious hosts.

Yet, for the most part, people can come together despite these rivalries and sit side by side in a stadium, cheer for opposing teams, and not beat the life out of one another. Fascinating. It’s another reason why I watch the Olympics. People come from all over the world to compete, despite political and religious differences, and only occasionally does anyone die. I watched the 1972 Olympics. Like I said, childhood events can shape your life.

So what does this have to do with Drew Carey? Well, the other night I was trying to watch Ann Coulter debate Arianna Huffington and T was in the kitchen making it difficult to hear what they were shouting at each other. He despises these “debates,” he hates the penchant for taking sides, and he loathes Ann Coulter. I like her - she’s a hoot. But to him it’s all noise and a waste of time and energy. He walked into the room and stared at me.

“I just want to ask you something. How exactly do you see the world? What is it precisely that you envision? What do you want the world to look like? Can I just ask you that and get a simple answer?”

I thought for a moment and said:

“I guess I’d like it if everyone would just behave.”

“So you want everyone to agree with you. No dissent.”

“No, I don’t mind dissent and I don’t want everyone to agree on everything. I just want people to be responsible and decent and behave. I think a sense of decorum is in order.”

“So if everyone just behaves the world would be perfect?”

“Maybe not perfect, but it would be better.”

So when I heard Drew Carey explain his personal philosophy, I said: “Ah-ha!”

“My theory of life is to take care of myself, my family, and the people I come into contact with every day. As long as I’m showing them love and being nice to people, I’m doing pretty good. I don’t have time to worry about what President Bush or Hillary Clinton said. I don’t listen to actors, I only listen to people who are experts in their fields. I honestly don’t care what actors have to say about politics.”

Then he said that if everyone would just do the same - take care of their business and treat everyone well - the world would be a better place. True, we are the world in small. We, too, can be Olympians: work hard, do our best, and weather both victory and failure. We can cheer for others and encourage their success. We can feel others’ pain and empathize when they experience defeat. We can mix and mingle with people who are different from us and learn more about them and ourselves. We can do this.

If only we could just behave.

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