Happy Thanksgiving!
Writing by treason on Thursday, 24 of November , 2005 at 7:59 am
I’d considered using this space to list all the things I’m thankful for and to acknowledge all those - especially in the armed forces - who are away from home and family this year. Then it occurred to me that many people are thankful this season precisely because they are away from home and family.
And a Thanksgiving never goes by without a salute to Martha Stewart. Love her or hate her, her holiday special made a lasting impression on me. The one where she brought out the antique glass turkey shaped candy dishes and used them on the dinner table to hold condiments. What was fascinating was watching her choose table linen, dishes, and flatware, emphasizing that you can mix and match and come up with something unique. I have lived by this rule ever since. I mix dishes, napkins, utensils and make it all work. This system functions remarkably well, especially if you have dinner guests who tend to break your plates and glassware with wild abandon.
I’m trying to remember if this was the same special that featured the gingerbread house replete with tennis courts and stables. Why would someone eat Martha’s gingerbread house, I asked, when a family of four could live in it?
Thanksgiving is also a good time to do something kind if doing something kind is something you generally don’t do. My friend Louise e-mailed to say that PETA praised President Bush this week. How could this be? Well, it’s the time of year to pardon the White House turkey! Not just one turkey, but two, because there’s always a back-up bird just to be safe.
This was the first year that I actually missed the coverage. Happily, I know that I can go to the POTUS’ website (link conveniently provided here on this page) and find photos and the President’s remarks. (They were charming, incidentally.) What’s different this year is that Marshmallow and Yam (the alternate bird) will both be served - er, I mean both serve as honorary grand marshals at Disneyland’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. And, as Mr. Bush has pointed out, the pair will spend the rest of their natural lives at Disneyland. My life should be so exciting.
Someone can correct me, but didn’t this tradition begin with Lincoln? If memory serves, his son Tad named the holiday bird Jack, and when he discovered that Jack was going to be the main course, he got so upset that the president “pardoned” the bird and spared his life. Dinner plans were ruined, so the family decided to go to the theater instead. No, wait, that was another night.
Anyway, other presidents’ kids must have been heartless little carnivores because I’m not sure turkeys were consistently pardoned after that. Some sources say birds were pardoned, but not all ended up living happily ever after; other sources say the tradition faded but was resurrected with Truman. I could research this a bit more, but I have an eighteen pound bird of my own that I must prepare.
And so does the governor of Iowa - a Democrat, no less! - who has decided that the citizens of his state might have concerns about the safety of their Butterballs during this bird flu season. To demonstrate that they have nothing to fear, he is going to consume the bird that would otherwise be spending the rest of its life roaming free at an Iowa farm. Shocking! (Better nix any plans to run for the presidency, Tom.)
I did find something online that I’d like to share. It was on a site that featured poems for all occasions, and this one is attributed to “Laurie.”
Albuquerque Turkey
(Sung to “Clementine”)
Albuquerque he’s my turkey
Oh he’s feathered and he’s fine
He wobbles and he gobbles
And I’m awfully glad he’s mine.
He’s the best pet
You could ever get.
Better than a dog or cat.
Albuquerque he’s my turkey
And I’m awfully glad of that.
Albuquerque he’s my turkey
He’s so cozy in his bed
Because for Thanksgiving dinner
We had scrambled eggs instead.
My Seventh Day Adventist sister called to say that she would be serving something called “sloppy lentils” to the family. So, on this day, my guests and I will give thanks because we are not vegetarians.
Gobble, gobble.
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